Wednesday, 18 July 2018

Why I Enjoy Being Single...

Why I Enjoy Been Single...

I've been single for two years now and it's been the best two years of my life. No, seriously. It has. I got into my first proper relationship at a very young age, I was Fourteen at the time. I never thought that relationship would last, obviously I was very young but that relationship lasted around four years. It was a rollercoaster of a relationship, obviously I had a lot of 'firsts' with him... first time I met someone's parents, first person I had sex with, first boy I ever want on holiday with, first person who broke my heart. I never really realised at the time, but it was quite a controlling relationship, I never really saw my friends and if that relationship taught me anything, it was that you can give someone everything, yet sometimes it isn't enough.

My next relationship happened not long after the first one finished, in all honesty, this relationship was very much a rebound relationship. I feel bad for saying that, but after a few years and on reflection, it certainly was. It was quite a toxic relationship really, we were on and off, he was also quite controlling and at one point there was nearly violence in that relationship (not by me by the way) there wasn't any physical violence towards me, there nearly was, on one of my birthday nights out of all nights, however he promised he'd never do it again and after a while, I believed him. However, when I finally called this relationship quits, again the violence came back. Not towards me, but towards a new guy I started seeing. If that relationship taught me anything, it was that not everyone changes and if there is even a little sign of violence in any relationship, get out.

My last relationship was probably the one that taught me the most. I went through a lot with that person, especially in the final year or so. We had a bit of a whirlwind relationship. We fell in love, we went on amazing holidays, we got engaged and we bought a house together. On the outside, it probably seemed like the perfect relationship, however after a while the cracks started to grow. We'd argue over silly things and after a while we just grew apart, we were on and off for a while before finally calling it quits. If that relationship taught me anything, it was that sometimes love isn't enough.

As you can see, from a young age, I'd always been in a relationship, however, when I came out of the last one, I made a decision to stay single for at least a while anyway. I was battling things in my personal life and in such a short space of time, I had gone through so much, I lost my Grandad, my Mum and Dad split up, I was battling depression and anxiety and then I split up with the boyfriend. I needed time to focus on myself. I needed to make sure I was okay before I could make time for anybody else.

Never in my life did I think I'd stay single for this long, I think I even shocked those around me, especially my Mum, but, I've been able to get myself back on track, I've taken the time out for myself I  needed and I've grown so much as a person in these two years. I've become a lot more independent, even with regards to been able to stay alone in a house over night or been able to go shopping by myself. I make much more time for my friends now, I enjoy going out with them on nights out much more now as I don't have a boyfriend at home to worry about. I mean next month I'm getting on a plane by myself and enjoying two days in Zante by myself before my girls come out and join me for five days of partying, something I've never done before! I've gained my confidence back, I'm happier, I'm open to trying new things and I don't have to worry about anyone stealing my side of the bed. I don't have to worry about anyone, I don't have to answer to anyone. It's great.

Now don't get me wrong, when the right person comes along, obviously I would be open to a relationship. I've dated people since been single, they just haven't been the right person. I am just enjoying been single, for now anyway. 



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22 comments

  1. Being single is amazing isn't it? Even though I am married now, I remember my single life and I really enjoyed it as well! Good for you, girl!

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  2. I am so proud of you, seeing you change and become stronger! You are doing incredible.

    www.EmmyWritesAbout.com

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    1. Awh thank you babe! I couldn't have gotten through the last two+ years without you! xxx

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  3. I am so glad that you've taken some time out for yourself, sometimes jumping from relationship to relationship can be harming as you don't find out who you are as a person x

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  4. your first 2 relationships sound so similar to mine and I also took a "single" break - was such a good decision and I was able to become much more independent and grounded. really helped me realize what it was I wanted as well and not settle until I found it :)

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    1. Yeah a single break has really helped me out! x

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  5. I enjoy being single a lot too. I can focus on me and what I love to do. I do miss having that special someone from time to time though.

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    1. Yeah, I get you 100% I am looking forward to the right person coming along!x

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  6. I think this is the best attitude to have. If you're happy with yourself, then the right person will come along and you'll want them because they add something, not because they fill a void.

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    1. Yeah, I agree! I am so much happier with myself now! x

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  7. Proud of you for how far you've come and you are smashing life! You don't need a man to be a girl boss do you!?<3

    Katie | www.justkatiee.com XX

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  8. It’s good that you have taken time out to find your self , there is no rule that you should always be in a relationship. When the time is right and you meet the right person things will work put them selves. In the mean time enjoy your freedom.

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  9. Well done you! I love being single 90% of the time. Mainly because I love spreading my arms and legs out and taking up the whole of my double bed! ;)

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    1. Haha, yeah this is deffo the best part! x

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  10. Loved this post - sometimes it is easy to stay in relationships just because the thought of being single can be scary. I love how brave you are being and it sounds like you are having lots of fun!!

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  11. Being in a relationship is fun but being single isn't any less of it. It's so much fun too. You'll get to find yourself and have time for yourself too!

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